“Hey,” Tara said softly as Jax closed the door behind him. She’d given him a key after Kohn, so he could come and go on his schedule. Eventually they’d figure out what this is between them but until then she was content just to see him.
Holding his cut and shrugging out of his gun holster, he placed both on the nearby chair. “It’s late,” he commented with a hushed tone of concern.
“I wanted to review some procedural notes for a surgery on Friday,” the brunette doctor replied in answer to the unasked question, her attention on the open books and papers scatted across the coffee table.
“Studying, huh?” Jax sighed, relieved. Too much shit had been happening lately; it put him on edge and made anything out of the ordinary suspect. After a pause, he pulled the blue SAMCRO hoodie over his head and put it on the chair with the rest of his things.
“Yeah, a little,” Tara explained as he dropped with a sigh into a casual reclining position on the couch next to her.
“I remember when we would study here,” Jax reflected thoughtfully, trailing his fingers lightly down her back, lingering on the exposed skin above her sweats.
“We studied?” she asked with a soft laugh, closing her books and turning to give her biker boyfriend her full attention. As teens they had used the premise of studying to get together but in her memory had spent more time making out than hitting the books.
“Yeah, a little,” he conceded, repeating her words with a grin. His earlier worry had dropped away now that he was here, with her. He ran his hand slowly along her arm until he reached her shoulder. Squeezing gently, he pulled her toward him for a kiss. It was a slow, soft kiss, the kind with a hint of a promise, that kind that built up heat by slow and steady degrees.
“Do you remember the first time I kissed you?” Jax asked, nipping gently at her lips and stroking the curve of her jaw with his thumb. He sank back into the couch, watching her face and waiting for her answer.
Tara wondered at his mood and train of thought. She smiled. Of course she remembered. “Outside Mr. Amherst’s English class. You asked me out, I said yes, you smiled, and then you just… kissed me.” To illustrate, she shifted and leaned over him, dropping a quick light kiss on his lips. “It surprised me.”
“Yeah?” he replied, seemingly distracted. That spontaneous gesture had taken him by surprise as well; he could remember almost holding his breath, half expecting her to say no to his request and a bit disconcerted that her answer had mattered so much. Even then he hadn’t lacked for female attention, crow-eater or otherwise, so his interest in the cool Tara Knowles had been somewhat inexplicable.
“We went out that Friday night,” Tara continued, stroking the blonde goatee he now sported and thought of the boy she had known then and the man now in front of her. He was only getting more attractive as he got older. “I met you there, the pizza place on Main, and we talked until they kicked us out to close. Do you remember?”
Jax nodded, his lips curving up in a smile. His memory of that night was still crystal clear – it was their first date and yet that was the night he fell in love with her. Moving his hand to the back of her head, he attempted to pull her to him for a kiss only to be stopped by her hand on his chest.
“You gave me a ride home. It was so…” her voice dropped to a hushed whisper. She had not been without experience before that night, but being on the bike with Jax had been more provocative and arousing than anything she had previously known or had even expected. “…so intimate. My arms, my legs… around you. My body pressed against yours.” She traced his eyebrow with a fingertip. “I think you took the long way on purpose.” She tucked an errant strand of hair behind his ear. “Then when we got to my house, right after we got off your bike… then you kissed me. Really kissed me. It was slow, and hot, and I… Oh, God, Jax, … I just melted.” And I never wanted to let go, she added in thought but left the words unspoken.
Feeling the sultry heat of her whispered words Jax ignored the resistance from her braced hand and tugged her close, his lips settling on hers in much the same way he had kissed her all those years ago. He cupped her head, urging her to tilt her head as his tongue traced a path along her lips until she opened them in invitation. She sighed and sank into him, into their kiss, any pretext of resistance gone.
Several hot kisses later she felt his hand move up her side to glide over her breast. He rubbed slow circles with his palm, feeling her nipple firm even more under his caress. He moved to stroke the taut peak firmly with his thumb, applying more pressure until he impatiently slid his hand under her tank so he could feel her bare skin.
Breaking their kiss, Tara murmured softly, “Do you remember the first time you touched them?”
“No,” he admitted with a hint of apology as he shifted their positions and urged her back on the couch. Following her down, he slowly pushed her top up to expose her breasts. His gaze drifted lazily over her, admiring her naked curves. “But I remember the first time you let me kiss them. It was right here, on this couch. Your Dad was gone or…” he trailed off, not wanting to bring up bad memories of her often drunk father. “We were alone,” he finished with a suggestive whisper. His blue eyes locked with her green ones and he slowly laved one taut peak with his tongue before closing his mouth over it.
Burying her fingers in his hair, Tara arched up against him, wanting more of the heady pleasure that he so easily awakened in her body. Each pull of his mouth sent a spiral of heat coursing through her veins, into her belly. “It was at the movie theater,” she said, closing her eyes and dropping her head back.
“Hm?” Jax murmured as he kissed and nibbled a path to her other breast.
“When you touched them,” she answered, tugging his hair slightly to hurry his progress to her anxious, waiting nipple. “I don’t even remember the movie…”
He smiled at her impatience, reminded of how sensitive her nipples where, how much she liked his attention to them. Some things hadn’t changed in their years apart. “Mmm-hm,” he acknowledged absently as his mouth closed over her other taut peak. He suckled hard and she whined in approval, her hips beginning a slow rock against his. The sheer pleasure of his touch spread through her body in a molten heat making her every nerve hum with anticipation.
Shifting his weight, Jax slid his mouth along the smooth column of her throat to the sensitive hollow behind her ear. At the same time, he moved one hand down her flat stomach and inside her pants, stopping on the neatly shaved patch of hair at the apex of her thighs. That was different now, he mentally noted; she hadn’t shaved as much back then.
“Do you remember the first time I touched your pussy?” he asked, his voice velvety and low as he nuzzled her cheek.
Her lashes fluttered and Tara opened her eyes to look at him. She lifted her hips slightly, encouraging him to do now what he had just asked her to recall in memory. Quirking one eyebrow in question, a hint of a smile playing on his lips, Jax shook his head in response to her tempting offer.
“Opie’s.” Tara acquiesced with a slight smile and a soft exhalation of breath. She ran her hands along his neck to his shoulders and back again to his hair, her mind drifting back to that day. “He had a party. We were kind of drunk. Opie told us to stop with the PDA so we ducked out and into his room.” She smiled faintly in memory; they couldn’t seem to keep their hands off each other and things were getting increasingly heated and more intimate each time they were together. “We were making out just inside the door… we were there for a little while… I don’t know how long… when you put your hand in my pants.”
With a quick move, Jax stood and pulled Tara to her feet. Spinning them around, he walked her back until she was pressed against the nearby wall in a re-creation of that moment. Placing his palm flat on her stomach, he moved his hand with slow deliberation down the front of her sweats, stopping when his fingers brushed lightly across her clit. His breath was warm against her ear as he whispered, “Like this?”
With a rush of memory and heated passion coursing through her veins, Tara answered by pulling his head down for a deep, soul-stirring kiss. Her hips began a slow rotation as he pushed first one finger, then a second inside her.
“You’re so wet, babe,” he murmured, shifting to kiss her ear, her neck, before returning back to her lips. The husky words set her nerves on edge and sent her heart racing; her body hummed with raw need. She bit at his lower lip then laved it with her tongue in soothing apology before pressing her mouth to his again.
When his thumb pressed firm circles against the sensitive nub of her clit, Tara gripped his shoulders hard, her nails digging in through the cotton of his t-shirt. Her body was seemingly no longer in her own control. She lifted her hips to meet his exquisite stroking fingers, the delicious sensations spiraling higher with each touch… Her head dropped back against the wall as she gave herself up to the steadily building coil of tension. A small groan escaped her lips… he would make her come… But she hadn’t, then… Piney had interrupted, startling them with a hard knock on the door and a shout to ‘get their asses out of there’ along with something about ‘not making babies on his watch’ that she only partially recalled.
She sucked in a deep breath and shoved at his shoulders, halting the delicious, peaking pleasure with what felt like monumental effort.
Caught off guard Jax dropped his hands from her and stumbled back. His brows lifted in question.
“Not yet,” she breathed heavily in answer. After a second bracing inhale, Tara pushed away from the wall to stand in front of him. She ran her fingertips lightly down his chest. “Do you remember,” she murmured softly as she grasped the hem of his t-shirt and pulled it up. He took over, dragging it over his head and off as her hands reached for his belt buckle. She slipped open the clasp with one hand as she ran the other along the hard length of his arousal through his jeans. “The first time…” slowly she sank down on her knees. Looking up, she caught and held his gaze as she unzipped his jeans and tugged both pants and boxers down his legs, “that I went down on you?”
Jax smiled and stepped out of the material pooled at his feet, kicking the discarded clothing aside along with his white sneakers. As he brushed her hair back from her face, he was struck by how beautiful she was and how lucky he was to have her back in his life.
Tara waited patiently for his answer, playing the game as well as he.
With her palms warm on his thighs, her rosy pink lips a hairsbreadth away from his hard cock and the smile on her face evocative and promising, Jax was easily inclined to answer, his memory of the occasion flawless. “Merced Woods, the place out by the streams. We were there with my bike, a couple of joints, and some beers.” He’d had his dick sucked by more proficient and experienced women before that day but that time had been singularly memorable. Tara had been tentative but enthusiastic, and in the following months of their relationship had actively perfected her technique.
Satisfied with his reply, she licked the tip of his cock, tasting the liquid evidence of his desire. Unhurried, she lapped and nibbled a path down the hard length of his shaft, savoring the taste of him with small, appreciative sighs. Finally she parted her lips and sucked him into the wet heat of her mouth, relaxing her throat to take him in as deeply as she could.
Jax closed his eyes, his head dropping back and his fingers sinking into her hair. Her mouth surrounding him was warm, teasing, and provocative. She knew him like no one else ever had or could; she had, after all, acquired her skills with his guidance; her expertise tuned exactly to each and everything he liked – where and how to touch, how hard, how soft… the room seemed to drop away and his focus centered solely on the woman at his feet and the intense sensations she was evoking with her lips, her tongue, and her hands.
She could hear his harsh breathing and feel his fingers flexing in her hair as she moved. Jax swayed his hips slightly when she withdrew and he seemed to purr in satisfaction when she returned, swirling her tongue around the sensitive ridge below the head of his shaft before sucking him deep in her mouth again. Her own restless desired surged through her blood to pulse between her legs in time with each thrust of his hips.
With a groan, Jax pushed back with a jerk, his cock coming out of her mouth with a pop. He wouldn’t last if she continued…
Licking her lips, Tara sat back on her heels and watched him expectantly.
Reaching for her hand, he threaded his fingers through hers and pulled her to her feet. Tara rose up on her toes as he bent his head down for a kiss. His tongue parted her lips and he felt her avid response, her mouth opening beneath his and welcoming the deep thrust of his tongue with a soft groan of desire. Their kisses were heated, fervent and intense.
Walking backward, Jax pulled her toward the bedroom. Just before reaching the bed, he abruptly swung her in his arms and tossed her in the center of the mattress. Tara let out a surprised squeal that turned into a giggle and dissolved in a breathy sigh as her glance swept over his nude form… his body was nearly perfect – all golden, toned and athletic. His gaze was heated, a hint of wildness in his beautiful blue eyes. He was so gorgeous, it bordered on sinful. And he was hers. It was a heady feeling to know that she could affect a man like Jax Teller so powerfully. She shivered, goose bumps rising along the back of her neck and her arms.
He lifted his chin with a small jerk and she understood the unspoken demand. She tugged the tank top over her head and tossed it carelessly aside. Lifting her hips, she peeled her sweats slowly down her legs and dropped them in the general direction she had thrown her top. Catching his gaze, she waited.
“Touch me,” she murmured, breaking the hushed silence.
Jax crawled slowly up the bed, his possessive gaze following his hands as they slid up her calves, gliding up along the inside of her thighs and parting her legs to make room for him.
Leaning back on her elbows, she watched her lover and waited for the touch she knew was coming, the one that would send her already frenzied senses scattering.
“Do you remember,” he murmured deeply, settling on his stomach at the apex of her thighs, “the first time I kissed your pussy?” He nuzzled her thigh, planting soft kisses on the smooth, warm skin until he was a kiss away from her pink, wet slit.
“Jaaaxxx,” Tara breathed impatiently, her nerves tingling under the light touch of his fingers stroking her skin, gliding along her thigh and coming ever so close to the part of her body that craved his touch only to reverse and retrace a path back toward her knee. “Please, baby.”
He leaned his head against her thigh, a look of little boy innocence on his face. He knew he could last at this game longer than she.
Capitulating easily with a small smile, she sighed. “A SAMCRO party at the Clubhouse, one of the apartments there.” Her sigh turned into a moan, as his tongue swept slowly, artfully over her wet and sensitive folds in reward.
“Chibs’,” Jax supplied helpfully. It had been years before he had his own room there. He paused again. “And?”
“Chibs’ apartment. There were so many people at the party there… you said you wanted to be alone so we went to the apartment. We were kissing, making out…” she gave a wry smile, that had been their standard M.O. by then, much to Gemma’s displeasure. “You kissed me… there…” She initially protested the intimate act out of inexperience and embarrassment, but the resulting pleasure could not be denied. She had even blacked out briefly from the mind-blowing, cataclysmic glory he had shown her. Her voice dropped, husky with emotion, “and then you made love to me…” The night she had given her virginity to him was burned so vividly into memory she was sure she would never forget even a single moment. They had been so in love…
He understood the undercurrent of emotion; it was a night he would never forget as well. He turned his attention then to pleasing her, to bringing her body to life in the way he knew he could, to show her in the most intimate of ways, his love and affection. Her hips lifted in anticipation of his touch. A soft, needy sound escaped her lips and the liquid warmth flooded her core when she felt the slow lave of his tongue, the deft pressure sending exquisite vibrations upward and outward in blissful waves. Her nerves tightened and her muscles tensed as he skillfully manipulated her body, lapping at her, sucking the sensitive nub of her clit between his lips and slipping first one finger, then two into her slick and swollen folds.
Tara lost the capacity to think as the tidal wave of raw sensation swept through her, sending her pulse racing and heart hammering. She rocked her hips in restless fever as he relentlessly licked, nibbled and sucked, his attentions thorough, indulgent and extremely gratifying. Heedless to all but the exquisite sensations peaking fast and furiously, her hold on reality slipping away as her body imploded with shimmering sensation, every quivering nerve firing as she reached that soul-shattering, divine climax.
Triumphant, Jax savored her release and the powerful contractions that rippled through her body as he continued his slow and erotic licking caresses. He waited for the last tremor to subside before he eased back.
“You ready for me, babe?” Jax murmured, his voice low and filled with obvious heat. Lust was pounding through his veins, his body taut and more than ready. Leaning over, he reached the side table, yanked open the drawer and fished quickly for the box he had left there. He tore open the package and rolled the latex condom over his erection.
Tara stirred at the sound of his voice. Eyes closed, she arched her back in invitation and cupped one hand over her breast. “Mmmm… yes,” she sighed impatiently, already missing his touch. Despite her recent climax, she still wanted him with an insistent pulse of desire that hummed through her senses and went directly to her wet, heated core.
He moved over her, his lips finding hers in a deep kiss. When she felt him shift, his weight pressing her back into the bed, all thoughts fled from her mind. She could no longer think, only feel, her every nerve quivering in anticipation. When he buried his face in her neck and drove forward, entering her with a hard, deep thrust, Tara’s breath caught with a gasp.
A heartbeat later, savoring the feel of his hard length inside her, she sighed in decisive response, “Yesss…” She felt perfectly complete, as though somehow she was meant to filled by him, with him. Running her hands over him, Tara traced the muscles of his shoulders, down his ribs, and along his hips until she reached the curve of his ass. She basked in the heady feel of his body over hers.
Jax clenched his jaw as he felt her warm heat close tightly around him. Fingers clasping her hips, he withdrew a little only to thrust forward again. Gradually he set a steady rhythm, pausing slightly on each downward thrust to savor the sensation.
Stretching up, Tara nuzzled his throat, tasting his skin with her lips and tongue. The tattoo on his back flexed beneath her fingers as he moved, his hips connecting solidly with hers on each firm down stroke. She purred deep in her throat, expressing her pleasure and urging him on.
Jax continued to pace himself even as the urgency built, wanting to draw out every moment of the rapturous pleasure. Closing his eyes, he concentrated, attempting to savor the touch of her hands on his body, the feel of her sweat slick skin against his, and the taste of her on his lips, as their bodies merged and came together in desperate need.
He thrust harder, and Tara sighed in pleasure. She arched beneath him, taking him deeper, wanting him more intensely, satisfied only when his hips connected solidly with hers. She felt the familiar tension coiling inside her as release beckoned, drawing steadily closer. Her eyelashes fluttered and her eyes opened. She tugged at his hair, bringing his face to hers, her panting breath mingling with his as they moved together, Jax intent on maintaining his steady, driving rhythm. Their eyes met briefly then closed as their lips connected in a kiss.
When the peaking desire finally consumed her, Tara clutched him close, clawing at his back. The overwhelming sensations swept through her, and the world dropped away, dissolving into an awareness of only sublime pleasure and Jax. A low, exultant groan escaped her lips.
The enticing sound adding to his own fierce need, Jax felt his control slipping away.
Bracing himself on his elbows, he gripped her shoulders, pulling her firmly into his every thrust as his cadence became faster, more urgent, more compulsive. He sucked a breath deep into his lungs and closed his eyes tight, plunging forward with barely suppressed violence over and again until the elusive peak of desire finally took hold, release washing over him in a rush of orgasmic pleasure. Long moments later, he collapsed over her, sated and content.
Long after Jax had fallen asleep, Tara lay awake and listened to the quiet, steady breathing of her lover as he slept next to her.
It had taken a long time after leaving Charming to come to terms with the idea that Jax was not going be part of her life. Could she believe that had changed? Was it possible to have a future together as he insisted?
She hadn’t been able to say the words to him earlier, but there was no doubt she loved him. That hadn’t changed. And she wanted him with an intensity that scared her… it was a hunger she thought would have mellowed with the passing of time and the absence of teenage hormones, but if anything the feelings now were stronger, more acute.
When he stirred, mumbling something unintelligible and reaching for her, she brushed a kiss on his shoulder and moved the hand resting on his stomach in a slow, soothing gesture. Without opening his eyes, he adjusted her more tightly against him, sighed contentedly and settled back to sleep.
He was, without question, immeasurably important to her. There was also no question that he lived a life she didn’t understand, one that frightened her and made her fear for him. Not just his safety, but for him… the MC would change him.
Maybe she should take Gemma’s advice and end this, before one of them got hurt. And more so because somehow she knew that she wouldn’t recover from any hurt that she received this time.
But emotion didn’t surrender so simply to reason… She had no choice. She could no longer see a future without Jax in it.
Sighing softly, she closed her eyes and snuggled closer to Jax, his arms tightening around her reflexively as though not to lose her while he slept. A sense of unguarded happiness and contentment pervaded her senses, displacing the worry and fears in her thoughts only moments earlier.
Her lips curved up in a smile. In the morning she’d ask him if he remembered the first time she said she loved him… and then she’d remind him again.